“You could hardly censure me more than I have already condemned myself,” Theognis told him. “Being both philosopher and priest, I am perhaps as some have claimed more of the former than the latter. Rigidly interpreted, our faith teaches that those who believe in the Lord Jesus Christ as our Saviour go immediately at death to dwell in heaven with the Father.”
“Minervina believed it. My mother told me that by baptizing her, you gave her the courage to face death happily. I have always been grateful to you.”
“She was a lovely child and her dying so young was a tragic thing,” Theognis said. “But she gave you a strong son, so her death was not in vain. I hope you will always remember her for that.” “How could I forget, with Crispus growing daily into a fine, handsome boy?”
Theognis continued
“You asked why so many Christians seem to seek death,” Theognis continued. “It is because if they die affirming Christ against oppression, they consider themselves certain of immortal life.”
“Do you believe that?”
“I believe it, yes.” Theognis’ face was drawn, as if from an inner torment. “Emotion urges that no greater proof of loyalty to Jesus could be required than to die because of him with his name on your lips. But Jesus also returned from death and appeared to Simon Peter and some others on the Sea of Galilee, after they had fled from Jerusalem. And when he told Peter, ‘Feed my sheep,’ Peter understood that he must go back to Jerusalem and face the threat of death at the hands of the high court, the Sanhedrin. The
Christian Church was built upon the rock of Peter’s faith and presence but particularly upon his acknowledgment of Christ as the Son of God.”
“This Peter was put to death, too, wasn’t he? I seem to remember Minervina speaking of it.”
“He was crucified by Nero we believe head down at his own request because he felt himself unworthy to die as Jesus had died. But by then the teachings of our Lord had been spread abroad and new churches had been established all over the world, so Peter could feel that his work was finished and go willingly to his reward. I have not been able to convince myself that my usefulness to Christ is over.” Theognis smiled wryly. “But I also wonder whether I tell myself that because I would not have the courage to die as Amianus did in the flames.”
“What does your heart tell you?”
Theognis gave him a quick surprised look, as if he had not expected such a question. “It tells me that an even greater work will need to be done after this holocaust has burned itself out. It reminds me that all seemed lost after Jesus was crucified, yet when Peter and the others took up the work again, it prospered.”
“Then listen to it.”
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